We are going insane......someone is going to get hurt.

Hi.....It's me Annie Grace.....
With visions of dancing sugar plum fairies, twinkling lights, Christmas carols and a big tree in the living room long in the past The Lady and I are about ready to visit our Toad in Miami. Snow...snow...snow and yet more snow. While all of this really has no bearing on my life it does affect my personal space and she is driving me insane. We spent "quality time" together yesterday...all day. Apparently sleeping on the dining room table is unacceptable. I was a little shocked as that is what I do EVERY day at 10:29 AM until 2:37 PM. Why would I sleep close to the windows now? They are cold. Why would I sleep on the floor? It's cold. Why would I sit in the front door? It's cold. I need height and space close to a radiator.....it's perfect! Has she no heart? So anyway..... I have to keep reminding her to get out there and shovel, which gives me some space. She says while applying a top coat of Opi -I'm not really a waitress vibrant red nail polish "Oh Annie...that really is really a man's job". Yes, I am fully aware of that....BUT THERE IS NO MAN HERE!!! She sighs, gently blows on her appalling vibrant toe nails and feels she has to wait about an hour before she can put on boots. I examine her toes closely....making sure not one whisker touches them and decide that she really should read more Cosmo magazines as she would know that red is .....out. But that is not my concern. With the mystery of Fred.....the fox....all solved we are now on patrol early in the morning to make sure he is OK. I have tried to remind her that he is a wild animal (does the word rabid...ring a bell?) and dressing like an Eskimo while looking for him is not "soothing for him"and you do not "blend". He is not from Alaska and your attire is not feminine. I am suspect that this winter dressing has destroyed her self centeredness....just a tad. She is in the abyss of her closet surrounding herself with flip flops and summer dresses sobbing. I comfort her by joining her and sleeping on the basket of bathing suits. Before I doze off I remind her that she looks a bit peaked and perhaps some shimmer will help. Off she goes....to rummage through her potions and lotions.