I had started out my morning so far on a good note. Only a minimal amount of personal space encroachment from The Lady today. Partly because of the hand swipe I gave her which seemed to make her more cognitively aware of her over whelmingness. First I should clarify that the 5:29 AM wake-up call is no longer part of my agenda. My nocturnal perimeter check is no longer on my "to do" list. I get carried up to bed every evening and lay on my blanket at the bottom of the bed. I sleep there all night and don't move a muscle until she wakes up and speaks. EVER. It is out of fear. Raw fear. The first fear is her feet. Any shift in my movement could result in being launched off the bed. The second fear is movement from me could wake her which could result in an outpouring of affection from her. Back off Lady! The third fear is my minuscule portion of Sheba-tuna flavored and I mean minuscule...carefully measured teaspoon. I need it...so I need to be on my best behavior. Well then the morning shifts into horrifying. I glance at the clock...why is she not getting ready for work? Why is she not rummaging through her GNP looking for the fall duo eyeshadow by Dior? Why do I not hear chaos in the bathroom with tools, blow dryers and product? Please please say you are just running late! No, I see the signs. She is working from home today. Now I must shift my whole day around which is usually perfectly planned. First I watch her take out the trash in utter embarrassment....I hope the neighbors are at work. Slippers (UGG's of course), pajama bottoms in pink, purple shirt and a blue granny sweater...oh yes and her hair is standing on end. Then I watch her actually wave to someone driving by! Get in the house...NOW! Then she talks on the phone to The NJ Waif for 45 minutes and I hear they are still discussing The Pigeon and her chain email. They continue to chatter and solve the economic crisis all before 9:00AM. With all their knowledge and ideas I am shocked that neither Obama or McCain have consulted with them. But then again The Lady is voting for Tim Brokaw because her cousin told her that he was running....see my issues? No logic. None.
But back to my point. She is home...with me....far longer than I am use to. There is only one solution. To look so adorable while I sleep on the couch that she is afraid to disturb me...it works.
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