How much drama is involved in replacing windshield wipers

Hi....it's me....Annie Grace,
I decided to take some time off from napping to share my latest experience with our drama. I say OUR drama because anything that affects my warden ....I mean..... mother, will somehow make it's way into my world. A quiet slumber filled world which is void of drama. Mommy Dearest on the other hand can take the simplest task and basically...screw it up. The latest screw up came when I was downstairs sleeping on the hood of the car, which was freshly washed so I made sure to walk through a bit of water before jumping up on the hood which was my version of a signature or tattoo. As I walked back and forth (about 43 times...give or take) over the hood trying to figure out EXACTLY where I would sleep, I gasped. No wonder the windshield is fuzzy after a washing, the blades need to be replaced. Knowing the severity of the situation in cleanliness I quickly took my nap and hightailed it back upstairs without even passing my feeding station to see if gifts were left. Actually....that's not true, I did not SLOW DOWN when I went by as I can see out of the corner of my eye....no gifts were provided. I ran around the house...about 3 times, deposited 6 clumps of fur on the rug, and finally found The Lady in the bathroom applying yet one more coordinating color of eye shadow.
"Oh Hello Annie Grace.....finished napping?" she says while applying too much Sugar Plum.
With my important message delivered to her she immediately puts down the Lamcome Quad of eyeshadow and spritzes a lot of Dolce and Gabanna to head off to Benny's to get new wipers. If there is one thing I learned upon my arrival here 570 days ago it is that her patience level is....zero. Meaning if something needs to get done or she wants something....it means NOW.
With new wipers in hand I inspect them while she reads the directions. I gasp...yet again. They are super duper RainX Elite wipers which I suspect are for a Hummer. As I help by sitting on the stairs watching her remove the old metal wipers with relatively little bleeding I remind her that she better have the right ones because now she has no wipers.
"I know Annie...I had the guy at Benny's help me. Usually I just stand outside in the parking lot pretending to put them on while looking confused and usually somebody helps me. But since it was getting dark no one helped." she tells me while turning the new wipers around 5 times trying to figure it out which end is up.
Needless to say...after 32 minutes and reading the directions 7 times....they still are not on. The following day....they still are not on and she has wrapped tissue with tape over the ends in case she forgets and starts the wipers. I am quite sure it looks lovely while she is on the road. Next she involves 3 men at work to help install the adapters needed. All 3 men can not understand why she could not just replace the rubber piece of the blade and why she had to have these heavy duty wipers. I asked her why myself but let it go after she explained to me it's the same as an eyelash curler.
You can only replace the rubber piece of an eyelash curler a few times before the metal part is not working to it's optimum ability and you need to get a brand new one.
She actually has a point.
None of the men understood that point but they too can not get them on. Since the old ones broke when she was removing them panic sets in. Does it look like rain? Finally she figures it out after reading the direction 57 times and seeing it's going to rain on Sunday I suspect she will be driving around town with these very expensive Elite wipers which have consumed 4 hours of 4 peoples lives.