We have a squatter

Hi....it's me Annie Grace.....

Out of sheer boredom today I decided to try a new Wild Card. I put my paws up on the back window sill and gaze out. She sashays by.... reeking of Dolce and Gabanna Light Blue (clearly a heavy hand this morning) "Oh Annie.......look how cute you are" she says. So slowly I turn my head, open my eyes really wide and just innocently stare at her. She tip toes away realizing that once again she is encroaching. Then....I gasp. She quickly comes running with some sort of headband now on which I ignore and know she is trying an Audrey Hepburn look but this is much more critical. Look ....I tell her. The vagrant is back. Every snow storm now SOMETHING is living under the deck. There are fresh tracks in the snow coming from the woods and the bamboo lattice is torn back. Now I am nervous. Am I in danger? Bob cat? Fisher cat? Fox? Raccoon? What is she going to do about this? First she photographs the damage thinking we can sue for punitive damages and then the tracks as evidence so when CSI comes to investigate she has the evidence before it melts. I take note that she did apply fresh lip gloss before entering the crime scene. She also thinks it might be a good idea to email them to The Felons as they have loads of tracking experience ...they actually prefer identification of wild animals by scat....but we will not be looking for that! Anyway......after her standing there for about 10 minutes I realize she has no idea what to do besides photographing. "Go poke under the deck" I tell her. She turns around and looks at me in the window and I see that dazed look in her eye....she is trying to figure out how go find a stick under all the snow without walking by hole. She is smart enough to recognize that there is only one set of tracks so clearly IT"S STILL THERE!

Now she is on Ranger Rick's web site (yes the magazine is still in existence) to investigate while calling The National Wildlife Federation. Oh goody...she has narrowed it down to a 21 lb bear or a weasel.